Well, what a lovely surprise, Exceptionals…this day just keeps getting better and better!
As well as your other attributes on the long—oh-my-gosh-you-are-so-amazing-in-so-many-ways!—list, you’ve proven to be generous and loyal readers.
I owe you a debt of gratitude; and time–no, you–will tell whether what follows is the thank you I intend it to be. 🙂
I may not have it all together,
but my half-full glass of optimism leaves me with more than enough to share….
and allows just enough room for balancing grey areas in my blue-skies-perspective.
As such, I hope this Mary-Poppins-reflection (my (lemon) twist on a “spoonful of sugar” approach) is to your like-ing.
After all, Sweeties,
it may be a tough pill to swallow,
but every day can’t be all moonbeams and shooting stars…
I think (80’s Canadian band) Trooper said it better, “The sun can’t shine every day”.
Now, don’t get me wrong: I haven’t changed my tune about each of us unapologetically embracing our magnificence…
But, the truth is—
depending on person, place, and/or time–
external validation can be a mercurial proposition.
Not everyone is going to endorse our awesomeness…
and not all the time.
In other words, there’s no such thing as a sure Bette…
Okay, time out and begging your pardon…
Here comes a twisted mea culpa…or, as it’s pronounced in my world, a mea gulp-uh.
Loosely translated, it means,
“My bad! Time for a bud-nipping confession-session, lest I get all self-conscious,
and start rambling foolishly”…
Wait, what other kind of rambling is there?
Oh-oh…too late…and now I’ve gone and done it!
In my zeal to keep it real-atable,
I dared dabble in free-style (uncensored) speech…
and babbled myself into a painted corner!
The thing is, “sure Bette” was a risky wager that got me off track when it didn’t quite hit the mark…
And, that left me worrying that you’d think I was trying to pull a fast one (*ironic, given how drawn out this metaphor has become*)…and so I…
No, I’m letting go!!!
I accept that I don’t have the skill to gracefully talk my way out of this detour.
It’s become a loop-de-loop that I’m too dizzy to navigate…
And I need to take steps to break it down for us.
I became worried that you might think I,
cavalierly and duplicitously,
tried to double down on the following occasions:
Taking advantage of the possibility that, unfamiliar with actress Bette (Betty) Davis, you’d think her name is pronounced the same as actress, Bette (Bet) Midler’s.
counting on that assumption,
I could take undue credit for connecting the title (“She’s Got Bette Davis Thighs”) to “there’s no such thing as a sure Bette”…
thus, compounding the cleverness of the metaphor while using it as an old-school segue seamlessly bringing me to the promised (and, much-belated) thank you-message you deserve.
But, if you think about it,
why would I take such a dishonest risk?
Neither (*forgive me Bette*) serves as a contemporary frame of reference;
if you know of one, you know of the other.
On top of that,
as far as the title/twist on the song goes,
it would only work if you were familiar with the song in the first place (“She’s Got Bette Davis Eyes”)…which would mean you were well aware of the pronunciation.
The reality is, it seemed like a witty pun at the time…
so I’m hoping,
given our history,
you’ll smile affectionately,
chalk this up to endearing/well-meaning silliness,
with a small shake of your head,
give me a (proverbial) participation ribbon for effort. 🙂
What I started out saying was this…
We need to believe in ourselves no matter what, because,
there will always be those who believe another’s gloriousness will somehow diminish their own…
or will prevent them from shining at all…
or will shine a light on their lack of perceived (internal and/or external) worth.
And that’s not the worst of it!
While I can personally attest to the fact that sporadic bouts of insecurity (and sometimes envy) don’t have to trigger malicious intent,
there will be those who seek to eliminate any perceived threat…
Make no mistake—
these struggling souls (manipu-haters) are adept at seeing another’s awesomeness (even, and especially, if the shiner can’t see their own reflected glory);
and will employ all manner of means to undermine another’s brilliance.
Case in point.
Singer, Kim Carnes sang the praises of a young Bette D.’s allure.
with the passage of time,
Bette was knocked off her peda-stool, and (type) cast as a quintessential crotchety—and deranged—old crone.
(*Think, watch, and/or Google “Whatever Happened To Baby Jane”, and/or “Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte” and you’ll see what I mean….
I accidentally watched H.H.S.C. as a child, and–had I known that the plot centered on gory and malicious mental-manipulations that’d leave me terrified and “Sleepless in (Brain) Washing-ton”–I would’ve avoided it like the plague (my dreams for weeks to follow)!*)
Bette becomes illustrative of the fickleness inherent in the cult of celebrity—
a flip of the coin whereby,
the chosen are targeted for failure (even by manipu-hators who helped hoist the celebs up in the first place).
And, this example parallels the cult of jealousy that we every-day (but, uniquely-exceptional) super novas might be subjected to.
no matter how gifted and benevolent,
and we must nurture and protect our internal riches….even if the saboteurs include people we adore…
(*An elaboration of this reality is best saved for another time*).
Oh, as for the title twist…
the thighs reference is a metaphor for targeted vulnerability—
going for the jugular/for the throat (given that the femoral-artery-metaphor is analogous to the jugular one)…
And, let’s face it,
for many of us,
our weight is our Achilles heel (even if we’re small).
Consequently, calculated criticisms have the potential to cut deep;
if we aren’t careful,
can quickly drain our self-confidence…no matter what our strengths may be.
Imagine how a,
(e.g. “Good for you for eating that: it would go straight to my thighs…”)
might ignite an inferno of distracting self-doubt—even in a supermodel!!!
(*Like I said, manpu-hators be wily* )
Lastly, here are two, last-minute, clarifiers…
1: Definitions/word-play I’ll likely reference in future:
Peda-stool: Without your co-operation and/or consent, you’re raised up, only to be knocked down and placed under foot (where others can use you to get a leg up/try to feel better about themselves).
Manipu-hator, and (keepin’ it) real-atable are the others…
(*Both occurred to me as I communicated today’s message…sudden and effortless, I know they come from God…not to me, but through me*).
2: Having thought of Bette Midler, I remembered her appearance on “Seinfeld”, which made me think of another episode where (my favorite) character, George Costanza, shouts “Serenity now!!!” in a futile effort to calm himself.
I couldn’t resist including it…I suspect I’m an reflexive hoarder. 🙂
Anyway, that’s it for this week…
I love that you were here…thank you!!!
I hope I brightened your day in some way…you have done so for me. 🙂
P.S. Every wordplay and metaphor found in today’s writing came to me as a result of our wonderful connection…you have no idea how much it means to me to discover new ways of expressing my thoughts and realizations…it brings me such peace. And, being committed to sharing with you ensures that I take the time to write. Thanks again 🙂