(Jan. 5/18) “Happy New Year’s Grieve (Less, Celebrate More)”

Hello, Wonderfuls!

Context: When reflecting on a rough time you’ve come through, self-compassion includes refusing to tell yourself it was nothing to get all dramatic and worked up about; for, that’s an easy criticism to level once the hard work’s been done.  No one likes a reformed (fill-in-the-blank) who—safely distanced from struggle—smugly preaches/invalidates the experiences of those yet to be liberated by insight, support, and success.

To that end (grateful for my forward momentum, but a work in progress nonetheless), I continue to display my—however unfashionable—(hem-ming and hawing) lines and lengths I’ll go to as,

Hi-low-hi-low, it’s off to perc I go…”

(* “On A (Don’t Be) Snide Note”, Says Me, a name I call myself*)

“For now, forget the harsh business of being in your head, Yule-y Truly”.

“With Christmas behind us and New Year’s pending, let’s get down to trade(ing) secrets—not wallowing in patent-ed (on-the-other-hand) emotions that try to convince us that if we’ve conquered a hurdle, it wasn’t one in the first place!”

“Living out loud is a vulnerable quest, bound to reveal the messiness of Butter-Finger-Fragments of understanding that need time to percolate…to marinate…to ‘double, double, toil and trouble…’.”

“But, rather than waiting until we’ve figured everything out (no such thing), we can take solace in a wits hunt that amusingly spells out the ways we are resilient…a metaphorical exorcise (Linda) blared from the mountaintop that’s helping others as well!” 🙂

And, to that end, Dazzlers, I offer this retraction-abstraction to illustrate my point…

I vow not to hide Me, Myself, and I behind (cell) phone(y), carefully (witch) crafted selfies that are in actuality, self-ish (as in, somewhat reflective of us—minus the filters, careful angles, lighting, re-take after re-take, and series of practiced facial expressions reserved for nonchalant beauty and a happy-shiny-people persona).

“And, Self”, says I, since we’re keeping it real-ish,

“Let’s not greet the New Year by turning to face it mid laugh, and

(with faux surprise)

announcing—in that cliched, ‘Oh, hello, I didn’t see you there!’, way…

“What’s that, 2018, you love my attitude?  This Auld thing?  It’s so last year!’ ”

“Nope…”

“We’re not gonna New Years (h)Eve ourselves off the couch to get dolled up in a quest to convince 2018 we’ve changed overnight!”

“(When morning rolls around) We’re gonna face the coming year head on and announce, ‘Contrary to your situation, I wasn’t born yesteryear’… ”

“And, I’m not (completely) naive, so I know you must have heard some things.”

“I also know lots of people are clamoring for your favour—hoping you’ll make all the difference in the world…”

“But, why don’t we take it day by day?”

“Become friends first…warts and all…before deciding on a year long commitment.” 🙂

Okay, Terrifics…

Here’s where I make (non)sense of my retraction-abstraction

I’ve never posted a selfie—and I am not criticizing anyone who does.  The above snippet was inspired by the inexplicable re-circulation of a four-year-old Facebook profile photo a couple weeks ago.  Admittedly, though a bit unfocused, it was very flattering—owing to a full complement of make-up, a great outfit and accessories, a bright smile…and the patience of the person who took it (retake after retake). 🙂

But, I must admit, I was uncomfortable with the thought that Facebook friends would think I reposted it in a fishing expedition for additional (very flattering) compliments.

Anyway, what I started out saying was this:

Despite acknowledging/dealing with ongoing emotional strains, I’m doing my best to celebrate the brighter side of this process…

And, as ever, the joys and blessings that are always present (if somewhat overshadowed at times).

As such, sporadically considering losses and betrayals (whether real or imagined), my latest assessment is this:

It’s not “revenge that’s a dish best served cold”

(a plan I haven’t been entertaining, I might add),

—it’s Letting Go!

So, taking inspiration from the mashup of an old-school nursery rhyme, a contemporary/instant-classic, and the eclectic pairing of Justin Timberlake and the diva of the decade…

A (mythical) duo I’ve dubbed, The Charmer and Adele…

I’m twirling and Dizz-ney with delight as I revolve—er—resolve to embrace their re-vamped hit (feat. Vanilla Ice),

“Hi-ho the Dairy-o: Let It Fro, Yo.

(Fast Forward Four Days—a day-long blizzard is raging.)

Speaking of den-eye-ing reality, I don’t like what the inside-looking-out views have in stor(m), so, I’ve closed my living room curtains and cranked the heat to a tropical temperature…

You see, following the lead of supporting actor, Richard Drey (I’m all about the) fuss’ character—

(an ambitious psychiatrist who learned hard truths in his quest to pull the wool over the public eye)

my plan, yet again, is to “take a vacation from my (‘What About) Bob’-lems” by “wasting away again” in an all you can sleep (Jimmy) Buffet

Fast Forward 30 minutes…

So, Amazers, it turns out that prescription was a recipe for disaster given that I’ve got no appetite, and Mr. Sandman must be on a tropical vacation of his own…

And who can blame him?

However, I’m left here to stew…no comfort there…for, it is too full of down-in-the-dump-lings!

And, let me spare you the trouble of trying to delicately ask what ever happened to my Di-ZEN-ey vow to Let Go of cares and concerns, my friends.

That particular bout of bubbliness was (air) lifted by a preceding week of vacation/staycation relief—

(Hole-up) time to myself that mitigated the winter-days and confused (by waning ambition) condition that many friends and colleagues are wrestling with as well.

Now that I think about it…for the billionth time, it seems…

That’s a big part of the issue!

With a significant number of my work teammates having moved on to other positions—

And other bright lights being away from the office for extended periods of time (as in weeks, and in one important case, months)—

office morale has been lowered at a time when chilly office spaces have reduced our voices to hoarse, throaty (feelin’ the heat) registers octaves lower than we’re used to.

Try as we might, we don’t always have the stamina to pull off soprano (“Home, Home On The) Range” for the long (winter) haul…

Having taken the majority of our vacation time in the summer, we can’t hit the high notes like we’d like to/used to.

But, wait, Lovelies one and all!

Here’s where I can turn it around (and around) and regain my sure-footedness!

I’ve been here before…winter is no surprise and spring is sure to follow with summer (“I’m sailing, I’m) sailing!” behind…

In other words, “This, too, shall pass”…it always has and always will…

And, now that I’ve remembered, I don’t need to A-dwell on this (what’s the) matter (and how do I fix it?) any longer (today)…

If I put my mind to it, I can simply “Let It Fro, Yo”—

Safe (cracked up) in the knowledge that I don’t need to over-think (*too late 🙂 *), or over-explain (*no regrets: this was a lot of fun!*)…

I can make like a Beatle and “Let It Bee”…

bumble along as I might,

I have so much to be grateful for…and sharing with you always reminds me of that…

So, as long as I can write, Loveables,

I believe I can fly…

And I’m going to take 2018 along for the ride of our lives 🙂

Happy (and other emotions, too) New Year!!!

Thank you for being wonderfully you, and God bless you and your loves.

Affectionately,

Truly

P.S. I think I’ve kept the obscurity of my wordplay relatively limited, but please let me know if you need more explanation than I’ve shared… “hemming and hawing” is an expression meaning one is indecisive—expending energy making back and forth arguments or looking at/for road blocks without ever resolving the issue; hi low, hi low is wordplay on (Walt Disney’s) “Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs”…the dwarfs cheerily sang, “Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to work we go”—such great role models, weren’t they? J; “Double, double, toil, and trouble” is a line from the witches’ song in Shakespeare’s play, Macbeth; to exorcise can mean to “get rid of something troublesome, menacing, or oppressive” (thanks for that succinct definition, Miriam Webster dictionary), and Linda Blair was the lead in the (1973) horror movie, “The Exorcist”; This Auld thing?—the word Auld is pronounced “old” and is found in the traditional New Year’s Day song, Auld Lang Syne; Frozen yogurt (a dairy delight) is known in cool circles as Froyo…which makes way for my (2013) Disney movie, “Frozen”– “Let It Go”–pun; Richard Dreyfuss and Bill Murray star in “What About Bob?” (1991), one of my favorite movies…and one of my favorite scenes is neurotic Bob announcing, “I’m sailing, I’m sailing…”–and the camera pans out and we see that he’s lashed to the mast. 🙂

 

 

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26 thoughts on “(Jan. 5/18) “Happy New Year’s Grieve (Less, Celebrate More)”

  1. As usual, a great way for me to start off the new year with a smattering of spectacular puns and wordplays.
    Wishing you a very Happy New Year, Truly. Only good things shall come for you in 2018!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you soooo much Rachel…if not for your comment, I would have wondered if that part came off as critical. I am grateful for surprises like the one you’ve blessed me with…it’s very validating…I’m on my way to “your place” to see what’s new with you, my friend. Happy New Year! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I truly enjoyed this one. Two things that stuck out for me: When reflecting on a rough time you’ve come through, self-compassion includes refusing to tell yourself it was nothing to get all dramatic and worked up about; for, that’s an easy criticism to level once the hard work’s been done-
    Oh my that arguments that me, myself and I have had when times call for reflection… Fun times… Always…

    The other one:
    “Let’s not greet the New Year by turning to face it mid laugh, and
    (with faux surprise)
    announcing—in that cliched, ‘Oh, hello, I didn’t see you there!’, way…

    I second that… because you know… change is always good with resolutions vowing to do this and that…but as you mentioned…change doesn’t happen overnight…so yeah we can skip the cliched ‘Hello’… and do take it day by day because tomorrow is bound to bring some type of change…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Your thought-filled observations are so rewarding in that they take my writing to the next level–that of a conversation, rather than a monologue…how very, very gratifying! And, your comments tell me something about who you are–about how you feel…about how you see and experience things…it’s such a blessing and a privilege and I can’t thank you enough for sharing 🙂 By the way, I’ll say it again–your writing is utterly engaging…just fantastic…I don’t know how you find the time, but it’s to the reader’s benefit that you do…I look forward to your next post (no pressure)! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. When I read your writing, I have to stop and ponder because I feel like you’re writing part of a journey that I have seen before. I read what you write and I’m like…dudesie.. I get it…I feel for you… making your words very real… Thanks for writing your stories. I do enjoy reading them. And you are too kind with your words but oh I am thrilled that you find my writing engaging… If I could just finish the 25 or so that I’ve started then you’d be set for a while. 😊

        Like

  3. As the east has been hit with a gnarly bit of winter, I’ve been thinking of you and hoping you’re keeping warm (& cozy!)…I can tell by your tricky wordplay (I love the Linda Blair shout-out!) that you are in fine form and ready for whatever 2018 might throw at you! Here’s hoping you have a wonderful new year, Truly!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Maybe not so much a new you as a more evolved you…the you who is living a life more reflective of the awesomeness you deserve…the life that the human condition gets in the way of. I wish you amazing things in 2018. 🙂

      Like

  4. I needed this today Truly! This part right here at the very beginning “When reflecting on a rough time you’ve come through, self-compassion includes refusing to tell yourself it was nothing to get all dramatic and worked up about; for, that’s an easy criticism to level once the hard work’s been done.”

    That is SO ME!!! I always diminish my feelings and have little self compassion but not anymore!!! Such nuggets of gold through this entire post.

    This too is priceless: “Happy (and other emotions, too) New Year!!!”
    It is okay to have other emotions! Who knew?!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’ve touched my heart…I wrote that first part straight out of the need to remind me not to betray my efforts/gains…and I really, really hoped it might bring comfort to anyone else in the same boat….I’m beyond thrilled that it resonated with you…and thank you for your honesty and generosity…you and I are really good for each other 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Every month my therapist reminds me because I forget. It just won’t stick that my feelings matter. My go to reaction is it could be worse or other people have it worse (and some do) making my problems of no consequence. You’ve helped me tremendously. I agree that we are really good for each other.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Isn’t it funny/horrible how we keep forgetting? It’s the remembering that makes us criticize ourselves. And, as with you, I struggle given my observation that so many are wrestling with issues far more dire than mine…that just makes me feel like an indulgent failure and I have to pile extra love onto myself and hold tight to faith…thanks for rewarding my faith!!!! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      3. You hit the nail on the head. Indulgent failure captures my feelings exactly. I felt it but had a hard time putting into words. You’re reading my mind again and validating my feelings. Thank you from the bottom of my heart 💜

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Winter is not my favorite season. Though the snow turns the landscape to a fairyland, I prefer to sit by the fire w/ my hot cocoa.

    I agree though that understanding needs time to percolate. Winter allows for that.

    I agree, also, that winter is a time for resolution. Not the temporary kind of New Year’s “resolutions” that fade like soap bubbles. But the the kind of determination that will serve as a firm foundation for lifelong change.

    I love the sentiment in your title: Grieve less, celebrate more. I plan to take that to heart.

    Happy New Year, Truly! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. This ‘Happy (and other emotions, too) New Year!!!’ sums it all up…great post again, dear Truly. Looking forward to follow you this new year ahead, on your path hopefully full of new adventures, gaining wisdom and wonderful new connections.
    Big hug, XxX
    PS…now I am curious about that selfie. Look me up at FB (Patty Wolters), add me please…so I can see too?!?! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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