Context: I’m not sure about you, Wonderfuls, but “time flies when (I’m) having fun”; and, becomes a Sunday driver when I’m sick with a cold or flu.
As such, I become susceptible to the prolonged irritability and impatience that blocks my creativity–eg. “When will my recovery speed up, or take a turn for the better?”
Thankfully, it’s the missing my optimistic self, and missing writing, that drives me to hold tighter to my faith that, as Leonard Cohen profoundly put it, “There is a crack in everything, that is how the light gets in”.
Such was a time, three weeks ago, when I began this post…
Home with the flu–and, too congested and weary to make way for the words/ideas to flow–I jotted down a few snippets…
and, over the course of the ensuing weekend, a couple more.
(A reverse nibbling away at a Willy Wonka chocolate bar, if you will…)
However, some of those snippets were a horse of a different colour; and laid the foundation for last week’s giddy(up)–post (Nov 6/16…”You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woodsman”
And, even though, having long-since recovered, today’s intention was to build on some joyful musings, these are the words/thoughts that asserted themselves…
They’re based on my memory of what I was feeling when ill…
Well, I guess the joke’s on me, ’cause here I am, Rue-minating with the frisky exuberance of an old soul…
And, the, “so-funny-I-forgot-to-laugh” part is–what might sound like a precursor to a positive journal entry (given mention of enthusiasm)–holds all the promise of a border-hack heading for a touchdown in the wrong direction…
For, the only fans celebrating this folly are the (Calgary) flames fueling my sheepless-ness.
(*Interpret this to mean: What follows is my chagrined-admission that, when it all becomes a bit too much, “Life is a mystery…” that has me “Desperately Seeking Snoozin‘!”*)
(*And, yes, I know that the Calgary Flames are a hockey team, but, what I don’t get is why you’re doing your pest to become a member of Pun Police…. *)
What’s that? You’re wondering how I find myself in this particular pickle?
(*Too tired to be roused by your convenient pretence that I’m not preaching to the choir–I’ll simply humour you…*)
Surely you remember waking this morning,
and being hit by the sledge-hammered-ton-of-bricks we would’ve been alerted to
if our barn-door of a scratchy throat had tried saying something sooner–
rather than waiting until it was too horse to do much more than croak a warning….
Thereby leaving us vulnerable to the opportunistic cold
that had our eyes running amok-y race all over our face…
and, our nose winning by a hare that proceeded to pound,
all over our aching sinuses.
And, how, upon realizing we were too sick to go to work,
you squinted at the bright side–
all bona fide, Clint-Eastwood-eyed…
blinded by your smug realization that you’re all caught up at work–
thus, free to take the day off with pay…and without (self-guilt-induced) recriminations.
And, you got halfway to feeling like (celebratory) Cinderella,
when the clock struck you as a mockery–given your arising knowledge that:
A) Time flu by while you were under the influence of your noon-time dose of Neo Citron…and,
B) The workday had long-ended; along with your hope-for-a-miraculous-recovery -reverie…
(* And, C…speaking of reveries, it’s the mother of all daydreams to imagine that we’re all caught up at work!*)
Any of this ring a (Tinker) Bell–you who refuses to grow up and face reality?
Sorry for the tongue-lashing-out…we’re all we have at times like these…God forbid anyone else see this side of us…
What do you mean,”Me”?!
There you go again, denying any claim to shame!
When will you accept that we are three peas in a pod…three sides of the same coin?
(*This will make sense later…for now, rely on Thompson Twins logic…remember them? Early 80’s band…a white guy, a black guy, and woman?*)
And, everyone has sides, you know…many more than three, in fact…
And, it’s a hurtful myth to think we have the security of leaving any part of ourselves on the sidelines…or, to be picked only as a last resort…
(*If we dreaded it in gym class, what makes you think now would be any different?*)
And, no, I’m not saying we should proudly let our “freak(in’ out) flag fly” …
nor parade it around town like a (free)-float(ing) anxiety…
But, do you have to be so literal so much of the time?
Let’s double-back to the football reference, shall we?
After all, there shouldn’t be any shame in our game…no keeping score…
“We’re only human”, after-all, “born to make mistakes“…including lapses in perspective and gratitude.
What I’m saying is, if everyone dared to attend “The Breakfast Club”, rather than “Fight Club”, we could speak to our common challenges….rather than relegating them to secret conversations (especially nocturnal ones) we have only with ourselves…
(And, let’s (two) face it, the latter approach is nothing short of crazy-making…a Durden-burden, if you will).
So, what do you say? Are you with me–myself, and I? Are you committed to standing by us, even when we’re feeling down-and-pout?
(*And, do you get The Thompson Twins word-play now?*)
I don’t get it…why are you looking at me like I’ve got two heads?
You’re usually the ones reminding me of the positives…saying things like, it’s our responsibility to do our best to “be the change we want to see in the world” (Mahatma Gandhi).
And, this late in the game, I would’ve expected you to come up with a pep-talky zinger like–No matter how many fumbles, as long as we do our best, we’ll always be on the winning team–or…
Oh, I see what you did there…reverse psychology had me making your argument for you so you wouldn’t have to tax our sore throat….you always were the smart ones…haha…
Anyway, message preconceived (*Get it?–preconceived instead of “message received” cause I started this post three weeks ago?*)…
Okay…I’ll shut up and let us get some more rest, now… 🙂
Until next time, Amazers…thank you…I am a better me because you are a wonderful you 🙂
God bless you.
P.S. The original title for this post was, “A Cold Again, Naturally” (A play on the 1972, Gilbert O’Sullivan, song, “Alone Again, Naturally”).
P.P.S. Context for most of the wordplay: “Desperately Seeking Susan” was Madonna’s first movie, and “Life is a mystery... ” is a lyric from her (1989) hit , “Like A Prayer” ; “Sunday drivers” is an old expression referring to leisurely drivers who hold up traffic and annoy others; “A horse of a different colour” is another old expression, and was illustrated in The Wizard of Oz; “ruminating” means to think about at length, and Rue McClanahan was one of the stars of “The Golden Girls” (1985-1992 sit-com), she played a sexy senior; “So funny I forgot to laugh” is old-school sarcasm; border-hack is my play on quarter-back (I live in a border town), and one definition of “hack” is someone with questionable (writing) ability; “fan the flames...” means “to incite/make things worse”–hence, my pun…fuel that fans the (Calgary) flames of my sheepishness (another word for chagrin)…and, I add another layer by changing “sheepishness” to sheep-lessness–insomnia so stubborn that it leaves me without the energy to count sheep (a traditional distraction/way of lulling oneself to sleep); amok (pronounced, a-muck) means to run riot/wild; the old expression, “closing the barn door after the horse has gotten out”, inspired my–barn door of a scratchy throat/deliberate misspelling of hoarse–a silly way of framing my procastination/resignation/failure to take proactive steps to mitigate my oncoming cold; “We’re only human”, born to make mistakes” is a lyric from 1986 hit, “Human”, by British band, Human League; Breakfast Club” is a 1985, John Hughes movie, and “Fight Club“, an Edward Norton/Brad Pitt movie, features an insomniac driven to (destructive) distraction by an imagined alter-ego named Tyler Durden.